don't judge my meatlessness...

there are a few topics that i will not touch with a 10 foot pole in mixed company…politics, religion…you see where i’m going? i would like to add another (because i know first-hand the effects) FOOD. what do you eat & why? i have listened to numerous conversations about various diets like ‘atkin’s’ or ‘south beach’ (which seems to be socially acceptable), but the second it comes up that i don’t eat meat…*awkward (for them, not me). people either tilt their head at me (cos it's so crazy) or “knew” someone once who only ate chicken (huh? how does that relate to me?) or "omg, you're not one of those PETAs, are you?" or an instant label falls on me. i hate labels, but if i had to use one to describe my diet (which is what folks are so interested in) i guess technically, i’m a pescetarian; described as those who ”abstain from eating all meat & animal flesh with the exception of fish.” or you could refer to me as a lacto-ovo (dairy & egg eating) vegetarian who eats fish. or...see why it’s just easier to say “i don’t eat meat?”

i’ve not always been a veggie. i have eaten meat…lots. i started cutting it out little by little in high school. i would go through stages. then there was the year that i was addicted to chick fil a biscuits. oh, & when i was pregnant, i craved freaking sonic cheeseburgers. like every day…seriously! (but after monkey arrived, i was back to my veggie way & have been ever since.)

maybe it’s because i live in the south that i get those very puzzled looks, but there are tons of others that follow this practice…vegetarian or vegan or whatever. not the only one here, promise. it’s not a new trend.

i get the most interesting questions & comments. (insert sarcasm here.) you just wouldn’t believe some of the stuff that i hear. i take most of it with a grain of salt. any more, it’s hard to keep a straight face.

why don’t you eat meat? is it because of your religion? do you let your husband &/or child eat meat? you have to eat meat to survive, you know. if you eat fish, you’re not a “real” vegetarian! hunters have to kill animals for us to eat because they will overpopulate too much. What do you mean you don’t eat meat?...none?...but it’s so good! 

& then there’s my favorite…where do you get your protein from?

so here are some answers that i have ready for these inquiring minds; should i ever get the nerve to actually use them, other than my typical, nice, let’s change the subject responses.

because i don’t. yes, & i cast spells on people who criticize what i eat. i don’t “let” them do anything…they make their own choices. i don’t actually. who gives a crap? you’re an idiot! see answer one.  & finally, why do so many care where my protein comes from? this is quite annoying (& kind of creepy.)

then, there are those who just don’t get it at all. for instance, for years my mother in law couldn’t understand the no meat thing; so i would get conversations like this:

her: we’re grilling out steaks for dinner. i know that you don’t eat meat, so i got you a piece of chicken

me: oh, okay…thanks.

her: try those beans.

me: is that just a water base?

her: (smile) just try ‘em.

me: (smile back) is that a beef stock. are you trying to trick me?

her: oh, my gosh. it won’t hurt you…they’re good.

me: no thanks, tricky mctrickerson!

*now, she is sure to tell me exactly what “special” ingredients she has or hasn't used so that i can eat her food. it’s sweet, but then i’m a jerkface because she’s made “accomodations” that i’m constantly reminded of.

i certainly don’t think i’m better or smarter or hipper than anyone else (because i have been accused of that...true story) it doesn't even make me necessarily more health conscious! & i love love love food! i just know better than to comment on what others eat; it's not my place to say what is right or wrong for someone else. i really could care less. even if it is a disgusting carcass from an adorable animal that was just trying to live a happy life. i mean, i'm not saying i don't throw up in my mouth a little bit when i see all that grossness...i just keep that info to myself. just kidding, carnivores!