just call me murphy...

you know that old fun quote...

anything that can go wrong, will go wrong

or murphy's law? yep, that's me.  it's my mantra, my calling...it should be tattooed somewhere on my body. right on my butt, maybe...i don't have one there. 

now i know that goofy things happen to everyone, but believe me when i say, i am special!  here are some examples for your enjoyment!

• i am the girl who steps in gum. 
• who spills coffee all over my white top as i'm walking in the door at work. 
• who breaks the last cigarette in the pack or lights the wrong end of the "lucky," just when i need the nic the most.
• who manages to break the same toe 3 times. (first initial break was at work...dropped a book on it perfectly...at the library!)
• i have locked myself out of my house more than a few times.
• i say the wrong thing all the time...my filtration is still a work in progress.
• i have the worst underwear in the world...wedgies heart me.
• my knee will go out when i'm wearing my cutest heels. then i get to limp around a bit, & give that ever so elegant "i can't walk in heels" look...which we all know is so becoming.
• i'm not a rumor spreader because if i repeated or said something about somebody, they'd be standing right freaking behind me.
• i taped over my wedding video with Olympic ice skating. oh, yea...it was the only copy!
• i don't even carry an umbrella anymore. the last one i had inverted on me...in a hellacious storm (naturally.)
• the one day i forget to wear bra shields (while nursing), someone else's baby cries & i lactate everywhere...i couldn't go into 'target' for a week!
• i was hurrying to get to class one day & half my skirt was tucked into my tights. that was a super fun moment. thank goodness for black tights!
• i run out of gas, like it's my job. every time i pull into the carpool line, i hear "ding, ding"...low fuel...woot! 
• my magnetism to doors, tables, or any run-of-the mill reminder of funny bones & shins is amazing. i double as entertainment around my house on a daily.
• the words power & tools make people who know me nervous when used in the same sentence.
• i always...i repeat, ALWAYS get the absolute worse grocery cart at the supermarket. not the one with the squeaky wheel that will quieten down as it gets full. no, i'm referring to the one that has a piece of candy or a rock hard mass of grossness on one of the wheels. it thumps & knocks so loudly that i'm just "whatever!" oh, & it squeaks too.

i know that are tons more to report on this matter, but i'm starting to bum myself out. HA! no, i'm totally used to my little wonky curse. when i have these crazy, inevitable moments i just shake my head & giggle.  & i'm not dangerous to any one around me, just to myself. so don't be scared of me. it's actually quite comical at times...just ask the hubs!